welcome to the fest

I've lurked on this forum since it existed so I'm not sure what history I'm missing but okay. The fact stands that when somebody comes forward to dare and say "Hey... this sends a bad message re: trans folk..." they are immediately stomped on because of course they MUST be trolling to come here and ...

This is NOT about you, Mama Immo, and people did continue to debate with you on that issue I brought up. I stopped because I'm tired and I'm not obligated to continue a discussion seeing you're unflexible; let's agree on disagree. You're NOT the one I'm calling you a troll. To me, especifically to ...

Ugh, Mama Immo, we don't own politeness to people that condone porn, prostitution and reality denial. Especially when they come here to "shame" us for asserting our opinions. What's the point in a "debate" when we all know it's not gonna change anyone's opinion? They just come here to repeat what t...

I think there are some curious, good-faith folks, probably who have been reading for a while, who come in and ask questions. They may not like the answers. It's hard to like the answers when the most common one is some variant on "Booooo! Troll! We're done talking to you!" Like. Where is the respec...

I've been biting my tongue on this for a while, but... You do all know that someone can have a differing opinion and/or generally disagree with you without being a troll, right? Being critical of something is not inherently trolling. People are often critical of things they LIKE because they are inv...

I cannot imagine anyone who is actively suicidal being let to do anything other than exactly what professionals insist upon for their own health. I have been under the control of said professionals after an attempt on my own life. I could do nothing until it was abundantly clear that I was behaving ...

Speaking as someone who medicates daily to control their own mental instabilities... and as someone who has seen hormone treatments and surgeries turn a friend's life around entirely for the better... I will have to respectfully disagree with you, Abbreviation. I do agree that you have every right t...

RikkiTikki, AnonFan, I would like to take this moment to thank you both for how this conversation has headed. I think I have rather a lot of research to do into the medical, and particularly cosmetic surgery, industry to widen my knowledge on the subject. You've raised some very poignant information...

I hear what your saying about the risks and social bombardment, RikkiTikki, I really do. But I do still feel that talking in absolutes about other peoples choices is a disservice to their own agency. Is it an absolute that there are severe risks and complications? Certainly. Is it an absolute that s...

Thank you, AnonFan, you are indeed correct that I'm talking about the choices of adults, not actions taken on children, and I very much appreciate the points you bring to the table. I'm not certain that these changes have as much to do with societal expectations as it seems. I'm not saying it never ...

Mamma Immo, I think the point is: you wouldn't say it's okey for bulimic/anorexic people to have bariatric surgeries or eat so little they are always in a starving state, even if they feel they are obese. Why would you say it's okey for people with sex/gender dysphoria to have "sex change" surgerie...

I think, RikkiTikki, that you are projecting your own risk/reward values on others. To you the possible harms and complications of these cosmetic surgeries far outway the seemingly negligible reward. And that's fine for you personally. But for others it might not be the same and it's arrogant to pre...

Z6IIAB, it's not so much that I fear questioning one leads to questioning the other... More so, they are each factors that can be counted in the many pieces that make up identity and I feel that it makes them deserving of some degree of consideration. This is probably going to get rambly, I tend to ...

Oh cool - yeah, I've seen her on shelves for ages and while I suspect I read something once I'm long overdue for another go. Of the three you mentioned, any a better or worse starting point? Brightly Burning is a good kick off as it's a stand alone story... but after that I highly recommend Vows an...

Gender isn't the entirety of an identity, no, but it is a part of it. There are aspects of our identity that we have little or no control over and aspects that are much more transmutable. We can't control our genetics, obviously, and time being linear as it is we can't control our age. But we can co...